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Tuesday, April 6, 2010

My friend, the Butler

Don't you hate playing the 'bad guy' as you repeatedly tell the children to pick up their things? My boys whine loudly when they are told to clean their toys and often Matthew expresses anger at me when I enforce the issue. I hate the tension between us, but I can't let him break the rules of the house. I wanted to reduce the drama and still have a tidy home.

A friend of mine shared a fantastic parenting secret. I really love it. It's the Butler.

I simply tell our children that our Butler is visiting this evening while they sleep. He picks up and throws away anything left on the floor. If they want to keep toys, the children must have the toys put up on a bookshelf or dresser. I don't like toys left out downstairs, so the Butler takes any toys left out and disposes of them. It's so fantastic. The children pick up their things and any animosity they feel is redirected to the Butler instead of to me. Anything they leave out is promptly thrown away at night.

I want to add a positive element, such as the Butler leaving a note or small treat if the rooms are clean when he happens to visit.

The Butler is such a great scapegoat and such a great motivator for the children  to pick up their toys.

3 comments:

G said...

Renae, you'll have to tell me how this goes. I have contemplated a scheme like this many times, but time and again I realize that I just don't have the guts to actually throw whatever they leave out away. I mean, some of it I'd have no problem, but not the nice toys that I want to be able to hand down to the next kid. Maybe I could just take it away until the next kid, but even that means robbing them of some quality items. I'm picky about what toys we buy and we don't buy a lot, so what to do when those are the ones they leave out?!?!?

5boystokiss said...

We do 5 minute cleans through out the day, and my boys have learned some things about it. They play with all of their toys on top of a king sized sheet. That way when I say clean up, they just fold up the sheet and put it in the toy box.
The other thing that they have learned is that Mom means what she says. I have about 3 big buckets of toys locked away down stairs (all confiscated from previous failures to follow instructions). The boys earn them back for good behavior(on a reward based system). But, in all reality they are relieved to have less responsibility (ie. less toys to be responsible for.)
Love your idea! Its always fun to have little golden nuggets to add to your pouch of mommy knowledge!

Unknown said...

Gretchen, I don't always throw away the toys. I only throw away the kind I don't like, like the dinky toys they bring home from the school treasure box. If they are quality toys, I hide them in the garage in a plastic tote. When I bring them back inside in a few months, it's always like Christmas because they're so excited to see these toys again. Erica, I love the idea of letting them earn back the toys, but then they'd know that I'm the Butler.