Decisions, decisions

I have an opportunity to fulfill one of my life goals. I've been asked to illustrate a book. 

I've been waffling back and forth for a couple of weeks....trying to decide if I should do it or not. You may ask me: Why wouldn't I jump at the chance?

Sigh. 

I'm not exactly 'on top of things' right now.

I really need to bring more order into my home (you know, by tackling the clutter that is currently invading my space and figure out how to more effectively use our closets, etc.) and work on our garden or work on reclaiming our garage as living space (more on that project a different day).

Then again, I don't know if this chance will come my way again. I've already started researching for these illustrations and sketching out preliminary ideas. I want to do it, but then again some days I think I must be crazy for wanting to commit to such a time-consuming obligation.....and it has those things called 'deadlines'. Hmm, that's pretty much a foreign language to me lately.

A part of me is afraid to commit to it because I'm worried I'll fail at it (remember my perfectionist problems? Here they come to nag me!), and a part of me says "Let's buckle down and do it! Who cares if the house is messy for 6 months? You'll have a BOOK that will last forever to show for your time! Do it!"

I feel so torn.