Matthew is doing a puppet show for me. He has a pile of puppets on the floor, ready for his disposal. The main character is looking for a friend.
Puppet 1: I'm so sad I don't have any friends!
Puppet 2 (entering): I'll be your friend! And I have lots of other friends that will be your friend too! (Matthew reaches for another puppet, looks at his two hands already occupied, quickly glances around for any way to add more puppets, then sheepishly continues) Actually, I don't have any other friends.
(We're leaving on a 3-week vacation tomorrow, the kids are arguing)
Matthew: Okay fine! I'm NOT going to spend any time with you.
Sarah(giggling): Well good luck with that. Try doing that on our vacation!
(When speeding downhill on a steep highway)
Matthew: When you drive down the hills, I feel like there's an Easter egg in my throat!
Matthew: "When I look at a bright light it makes my eyes feel like they need to roll over, and they're trying really hard to roll over, but they can't do it."
Daniel: (Running up to me brandishing a hurt thumb) Mommy! My daddy-finger hurts!!
We're playing an improvisation game where I call out a noun and the children pretend to be that object. Sarah tells me to call out 'candy', so I do. Matthew lays on the floor with his arms flat against his body, like a log. He calls out, "I'm a Tootsie Roll!" Daniel immediately wrapped his little arms and legs around Matthew and laughed, "I'm the wrapper!"
Renae to Nathan: I want you to be nice to other people so I'm not the only one knowing that you're good on the inside!
Nathan: Matthew- what was your favorite part of sledding?
Matthew: Going down!
Matthew going inside: I'm outta here!
Matthew coming back outside 10 seconds later: I'm inna here!
Renae: There's cold air coming in along the whole door here.
Matthew: Cold air in the dool whore here? What?! WHAT'S a WHORE?!
Renae: What gifts did the wise men bring for Jesus?
Matthew (ecstatically): Candy Canes!!
We were decorating the Christmas tree. Daniel was lifting ornaments out of the box and hanging them all on the same branch directly above the box. We have one figurine of a baby Jesus that he was hanging. Each time he hung it, it immediately fell back into the box. He didn't realize this and kept getting more and more excited each time he pulled out another Jesus ornament. The fourth and fifth time he hung the ornament he was positively ecstatic and laughing with glee, talking in an unbelievably high-pitched voice. Sarah and I were watching the entire affair and holding our sides laughing really hard.
Daniel: Wow! Mommy, LOOK! ANOTHER baby Jesus! Lucky me!
Sarah was excitedly telling me about all the cooking she's done with Nathan in preparation for Thanksgiving. She was gushing about cracking eggs, fetching milk and butter, stirring ingredients, etc.
She asked "Isn't that FUN?!"
Matthew muttered under his breath: "It just sounds like work to me."
It's dinner time. We all sat down to a meal of enchiladas, refried beans, corn, and rice.
Sarah looks at her beans and before diving into them exclaims,
Sarah: I LOVE these guys!
Daniel (from the other side of the table): ME?!?!
After camping the kids and I played at a really nice park in an old pecan orchard. Usually there is a stream and a large pond. This was a very dry year and apparently the park maintainers were taking advantage of the opportunity to improve the pond. They diverted the water and were dredging out the pond and stream. All that was there was a dry bed and a very large pile of earth.
In the bathrooms and around the park were notices that to stay out of the pond area and not to fish. Sarah asked what one of the notices said and I read it to her.
She looked around very dramatically and exlaimed:
Sarah: Pond?! Pond?!? I see no pond!
We were camping as a family. We were sitting together in our tent after it was dark. I commented that it was getting dark earlier and this sparked a conversation with the kids about seasons and timezones.
Sarah: It's dark right now but where Gracie lives (Alaska) it's still light!
Nathan: How do you know it is light in Alaska?
Sarah: Well, if it was dark all the time then Alaska would never be able to play!
Renae: Sarah! Come back to do school!
Sarah: I'm sorry. I'm not available on Saturdays... And today is Saturday.
Sarah ran off giggling.
Nathan, emptying his lunch bag after work, pulled out a bag full of croutons.
Nathan: There were more croutons than salad this time.
Renae: I know. I tripped.
Nathan: You tripped?
Renae: Well... My hand sort of tripped.
Daniel was calling people names.
Dan: Ha, ha, baby! Ha, ha, baby!
Renae: Daniel, say something nice.
Dan: Playdough!
Matthew and I were chatting. He was trying to refer to a cookie he ate 5 minutes ago.
Matthew: I had a cookie now, but not really now, just almost now.
We were in the car on our way to a rodeo for the first time.
Nathan (trying to watch the road and make conversation with the kids): Have you ever seen a rodeo before?
As I pondered on what a ridiculous question that was since I knew full well that they never had, Sarah answered very matter-of-factly:
Sarah: No. And neither have you.
Sarah: When I was four I used to put my fist in my eye and it looked like a party!
(Puts a fist in one eye)
I see stars!
Renae was playing a game with the kids that involved matching words that start with the same letter.
We let Matthew take the word mouse because he is usually really good about the letter 'M' for some reason. This time he was really struggling to come up with the right match.
Renae: Matthew. What sound does 'Mouse' start with?
Matthew (with a confused look): Squeak squeak?
Sarah and Matthew are baking a chocolate cake with Nathan. Matthew asks to taste the cocoa powder and Nathan explains that it's bitter and probably won't taste good. Matthew wants a taste anyway, so Nathan also offers a taste to Sarah.
She replies, "Not yet, I'm waiting to see the look on Matthew's face."
It's Daniel's birthday. Matthew is trying to persuade Daniel to give him a toy. Daniel refuses repeatedly. Matthew tries to ask nicely several times and finally exclaims in frustration, "Tough luck, Daniel! It's no longer your birthday!"
Matthew was praying:
Thank you for the alphabet. Amen.
Nathan had eaten Matthew's boiled egg and Matthew was angry.
Matt: Okay, Dad, then you CAN'T play with me!
Nathan: I wasn't playing with you before.
Matt: Okay, then you CAN play with me!
Matthew immediately tried to give Nathan a toy and force him to play.
We were playing the Gospel Game, where I ask the children different scripture-related questions. I asked Matthew who the mother of Jesus was.
Matthew: Mary.... Christmas!
The family was all in the van on the way to run a quick errand. Early that day Matthew had stepped on a sharp rock and had a band-aid on his foot. Additionally, since we left the house in quite a hurry several children, including Matthew, were not entirely dressed.
We all waited in the van as Renae ran in to run the errand. The children became restless.
Matthew: Why can't we go with mom?
Nathan: Because mom is going to be back really fast and several of us don't have shoes or even pants on!
Matthew: You have pants on!
Nathan: Yes that's true.
Matthew (Pointing to other family members): And you have pants and I have pants.
Sarah: You don't have pants on!
Matthew (very matter-of-factly): No I don't... But I have a band-aid!
Matthew was being sent to his room for arguing with Sarah. He was mad at me for sending him away.
Matthew: FINE! The next time a bad guy comes, then I WON'T be your hero, Mom!
Renae needed to use the restroom and Matthew was occupying it by playing in a full sink of water and bubbles. He's in it up to his elbows.
Renae: I need to use the bathroom, so I need you to leave.
Matt: But I won't peek, I promise!
Renae: That doesn't matter. I still need privacy.
Matt: But my bubbles!
Renae assures him that she'll leave the sink of water alone and he can come right back to play in it.
He leaves, saying(completely seriously): Okay, but please don't drown.
I was telling the children a scripture story for bedtime. We talked about Enos. I explained that he was a hunter and that the men in that time period hunted in the forest for their families food. I told how he pondered the Atonement and prayed. The following comments are from the end of the story:
Me: And do you know what? He prayed all day! What do you think of that?
Sarah (quietly laughing): Well, he certainly didn't bring any food home for his family that day!
Nathan was packing a lunch while Matthew watched. He included a can of V8 juice.
Matt: Can I have one, too?
Mom: You won't like it.
Matt: Yes I will. I know I will!
Mom: Really, you won't. I don't like it.
Matt: But I love pop.
Mom: It's not pop. It's tomato juice.
Matt: But I love toma-....(sudden realization)Ohh. (silence)
Matthew was running after Sarah, who had gone outside. He opened the door to tell me that he was following her.
Me: That's okay, but shut the door quickly, you're letting in hot air.
He dutifully came inside and did as I asked, then sheepishly said: Oops! I forgot to go outside!
Sarah loves singing "Once There was a Snowman" and acting out the parts. After singing it through and "melting small, small, small" she remained flat on the floor, silent and unmoving. After a few minutes, I urged her to get up, to which she replied (in a very sweet, high voice), "I can't. I'm a puddle!"
There you have it. Have a wonderful day! If you have funny stories, do share!
1 comment:
Those are awesome. Thank you for the smiles.
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